


A Cold Winter Day

by Pinkwebby



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games)
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Pregnancy, papa fenris
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-12
Updated: 2016-11-05
Packaged: 2018-08-22 00:39:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8266331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pinkwebby/pseuds/Pinkwebby
Summary: Hawke has been pregnant for nine months, and she is ready to give birth to this child. Is she really ready to have a kid though?





	1. Chapter 1

### 

Chapter One:

  


It was a cold winter morning, fresh snow laid fallen from the night before. Icicles hung from the limp branches of the trees outside. Children played outside, their cheeks rosy from the cold and their parents watching them from inside a cozy house. It was peacefully, to say the least.  


Being away from Kirkwall was always the best plan I came up with. Well, the best Fenris came up with. Coming back to live in Ferelden was always a small dream I had, but I let it go when I realized there might not be something to come back too.  
Fenris pushed me though, insisting that Ferelden wasn’t as ruined as I really thought it was. We took a chance, packing up and making our way down to Redcliffe.  


There was another reason he wanted us to move so badly.  
The life that was slowly growing in my stomach.  


I sat in the worn oak chair that I had placed by the fogged window, watching the children play outside. It seemed like they were having fun, and it was almost nostalgic to when I was a child with Carver and Bethany. Unfortunately, those were simpler times.  
I could still remember the biting cold of the snow as I carefully crafted the perfect snowball, then to have it ripped from my grasp by Carver because he couldn’t get snow to stick to make one.  


I laughed under my breath, my breath fogging up the window a bit more. It seemed like years since I’d seen Bethany’s face. She wasn’t allowed to visit, nor even leave the Circle. The fear I had brought with the mage rebellion made it difficult for Bethany to do anything. She was never bitter when I made the trip back to Kirkwall, stating that I was her sister no matter what.  
As I fondly thought of my family, I didn’t hear the light steps of Fenris coming down the old creaking stairs.  


A small movement in my stomach brought me back, and I realized my eyes were slightly watering. I dabbed at the sides of my eyes, snorting softly at myself.  
“You seem to be just looking out for me, right?” I asked my bulging stomach quietly, “I can’t ponder on things that I can’t change. It will only bring me pain in the end.”  


Another tumbling sensation in my stomach made me feel warm and happy. It would be soon that the baby would be in this world. It was almost nine months on the nose, and secretly, I was ready to not have a growing human in my belly anymore. The constant nausea, the loss of any control over my bladder, an aching back, aching shoulders, I could go on for days. I would be glad when I had a baby in my arms rather than inside of my womb.  


“You are up early,” Fenris’ voice startled me, and I jumped at his sudden appearance.  


“Fenris, don’t do that!” I exclaimed at him, looking up at his face and hitting his arm full force.  


“I did say good morning before I approached,” He responded, placing a hand on my shoulder and rubbing it gently, his thumb making a smooth circle into my collarbone.  


“Well, I didn’t hear you,” I said, “And you shouldn’t scare a pregnant woman!”  


I heard the light screeching of a chair being pulled up, and Fenris sat down beside me, staring at me with an amused expression.  


“Why is that?” He asked, raising his eyebrows.  


“Well, uh, because it could… it could scare the baby as well!” I lied. I quickly turned away from his face, my cheeks turning red with embarrassment.  


“We wouldn’t want that now, would we?” Fenris teased, before going quiet.  


I turned my attention back to the outside world, where most of the children had gone inside because of the frigid temperatures. Only a few remained, and they looked worn out already. Their boots dragged in the heavy snow and I could see their breath puff quickly from their bright pink lips.  
The world was peaceful, a quiet and sound peace that made you take a deep breath and look around. It spread a warm aura over me that went all the way down to my toes. If this wasn’t the best life to be living, I was fooling myself. With most of my problems receding like the morning tide, just watching something as simple as children playing was a nice break.  


“Do you like the snow, Fenris?” I questioned him after a moment.  


I glanced over at him to see he was looking at me. He slowly turned his head to look out the window, a thoughtful gaze laid over his features.  


“I cannot really say. I can remember playing in the snow when I was a young child, but after that it just became a reminder that everything goes away eventually,” He said.  


“Not everything,” I said, reaching over and placing my palm over his hand.  


Fenris directed his gaze back over to me, before his lips curved into a small smile.  


His hand turned over and he clasped my hand in his. I noticed his hands, though more calloused and rough, were smaller and more delicate than mine. And even though his skin scraped against my now softer skin, to me, they were familiar and comforting.  


“I love you, you know that, right?” I said, leaning my head over to put in the crook of his neck.  


My body protested at the twisting I was doing to get into that position, but I didn’t care. Fenris squeezed my hand with his, laying his head on top of mine.  


“I love you too, amatus,” He murmured, kissing the top of my head.  


We stayed like that for a while, talking about small things and looking at the beautiful snow outside. Our hands never left one another, staying together like our lives depended on it. Warmth radiated from Fenris’ body and left me feeling extremely comfortable next to him.  


I finally let go of his hand and traced my fingers up his arm delicately, as if not to hurt him. His marks glowed blue slightly under my touch. I trailed my fingers all the way up to his face, where I pressed my hand into his cheek. He looked at me, his eyes as green as the old meadows in Lothering. Once, his eyes were always guarded, never showing any type of emotion, because that was weakness. Now, those deep green pools were always open to me, and only me. I could swim in his eyes all day. I could see myself reflected in them. All the love and gentleness he felt when he stared at me was apparent in those orbs.  


“How are you feeling today?” Fenris questioned me, bringing out of my trance.  


I gave him a reassuring smile, “I’m fine, as always. The baby is definitely getting restless now that I’m getting close to having them.”  


Fenris hesitated, staring into my eyes for a moment, before they flickered down to my belly.  


“Can I feel again?” He asked, his voice barely a whisper. It was full of longing and cautiousness, with an undertone of slight excitement. Fenris had been scared from the beginning when Anders mentioned that I might be pregnant. He was always good at hiding his fear, and sometimes it was hard to see through the mask he wore. As I fell more in love with him though, I found it easier and easier to search his face and see all the emotions he was suppressing.  


“Of course, Fenris,” I took his hand in mine and gently guided it over to my rounded stomach. He slid his hand under the layers of clothing I wore and placed his coarse hand on my soft skin.  


A shiver ran up my spine and left my toes tingling. No matter where he touched, even just him brushing my hair away from my face left me with a warm feeling that matched nothing else.  


I placed my hand over his and guided it to where I felt the child was most active at the moment. After a moment of silence, the baby moved. I heard Fenris take in a breath, and when I glanced over at him, his green eyes were overflowing with awe and a look of protectiveness.  


After a moment, my stomach growled, which made Fenris chuckle. He pulled away his hand and it left me with an almost empty feeling. I sheepishly rubbed my belly, looking over at my husband.  


“You are hungry. I’ll prepare you breakfast this morning,” Fenris said, standing.  


“No, you don’t have too! I’ll do it,” I said, arching my back so I could force myself out of uncomfortable chair. Fenris looked down at me struggling to get out of my chair and he chuckled softly.  


“Don’t chuckle at me! Help me get up!” I whined, reaching out both my hands like a helpless child. Fenris looked at my hands thoughtfully, before his eyes flickered to my face.  


“You just stay there, I’m going to make you breakfast,” He finally said, turning and going into the kitchen.  


“Fenris!” I called with an irritated voice, trying to get up. He ignored me though, and I had to get up by myself. I scooted to the edge of the chair and grabbed onto the window sill. As I tried to force myself out of that stupid chair, I saw someone in dark clothes approaching our house. I looked up from my feet to see a hooded figure coming to the door. I finally let out a deep breath and rolled out of my chair.  


I hurried to the door to let the person in, knowing exactly who it was. The door was stuck against the doorframe from the cold, and it took all my strength to open it.  


A cold breeze dumped some snow onto the floor and on my bare feet, and I looked up at the man with a warm smile.  


“I’m glad you could make it even in this weather, Anders,” I greeted him, moving out of the doorway so he could come in.  


Anders gently pulled down his hood and removed his cloak, smiling brightly at me.  


“I couldn’t let one of my best friends go on without her weekly check-up. Especially when you’re pregnant, Hawke. Where’s Fenris?”  


Anders hung up his damp cloak and kicked off his frozen boots, shaking out his golden hair.  


“He’s making breakfast; did you already eat?” I questioned him, leading him into the kitchen. Anders nodded, “I wouldn’t want to impose anyhow. I just came for your check-up, and then I’ll leave you alone.”  


“Your visits don’t bother us at all, Anders. You’re always welcomed, even if it isn’t for a check-up,” I responded, lightly bumping shoulders with him.  


“Don’t listen to her, you are not welcomed,” Fenris said with a cool tone. The sound of frying bacon hit my ears, and I licked my lips ravenously.  


“Always the cold one, Fenris,” Anders chuckled, before looking back at me, “Thank you for the invitation, Hawke. If I ever feel the urge to come over for fun or for a good glare from Fenris, I will be over in a minute.”  


“I also wanted to thank you once again for coming all the way from Kirkwall for this. I would trust no other healer besides you during my pregnancy,” I said, sticking out my tongue. Anders let out a throaty chuckle, shaking his head, “You’re crazy, Hawke. But I’m glad you called me down. It’s good to get away from that hellhole every once in a while.”  


Anders approached the table we had in the kitchen, it was an old round oak table with three wooden stools around it.  


He pulled out a stool and motioned for me to sit down. I gladly sat down and stared up at Anders. “Just so you know, I might not be able to get up from this stool again. My stomach has a mind of its own.”  


Anders squatted down in front of me, rolling my shirt up to my breasts. His hair, the color of honey, fell around his face in small ringlets. He placed both his hands on either side of my stomach. His hands were very warm, almost hot. They weren’t sweaty, but they were as calloused as Fenris’ hands. Both wielded weapons almost daily, although each used a different weapon. My hands weren’t as bad, since Fenris all together forbid me to use a weapon while pregnant.  


“How have you been feeling lately? No nausea anymore, I presume. Any swollen body parts? Besides your stomach, mind you,” Anders caught my joke before I could even let it spill from my lips.  


“Maker, Anders, where do I even begin? I feel like an old woman. I look like I got bronto ankles, and my tits are leaking. They are _leaking_ , Anders,” I said, emphasizing the word ‘leaking’.  


Anders laughed, his hands moving positions and glowing a warm orange, “They are pretty much organic milk bags, Hawke. I can’t really help with that. And you don’t have bronto ankles, I promise. They are supposed to be swollen.”  


“Do you mind if I put my ear up to your stomach?” Anders asked politely, removing his hands.  


“Do I have any say in this?” Fenris said brusquely from the stove. Both Anders and I laughed at his annoyance, before I nodded at the healer. Anders pressed his ear to my belly button, only leaving it there for a few seconds.  


“Everything seems good, Hawke. The baby is really close to coming out. I’d give it a couple days or more,” He stood up, stretching his arms, “I’ll be heading out now, enjoy your breakfast.”  


“Are you sure you don’t want to stay?” I inquired. Anders shook his head and smiled at me, “I don’t think I want my heart ripped out today, thank you though. If you start to feel any type of contraction, you know, the pain I told you about, send for me. I’ll be here in an instant.”  


Anders turned and left the kitchen. I heard him put on his boots and cloak, and then the door opened and closed.  


“I really do hate that man,” Fenris growled from the stove. I pulled my shirt back over the planet that was my stomach, before I called for Fenris. “Help me up, please?”  


“No, you stay right there this time. I’ll be done with breakfast in a couple minutes,” Fenris said, pointing a finger at me. I folded my arms over my chest and sat at the table with a pouting face.  


“You didn’t have to make me breakfast, Fenris. I could’ve just gone for toast and strawberry jam,” I complained, watching Fenris. He was concentrating a great deal on two eggs in the cast iron pan, his eyebrows were furrowed and it made me giggle. Sometimes he was so adorable, it made me want to wrap my arms around his waist and hold him.  


With the precision of a two-handed weapon master, you would think he could flip eggs with impeccable grace. That was not the case, because as he tried to flip them, one only flipped half-way and the yolk broke on the other. “Kaffas!” Fenris muttered under his breath.  


“Having trouble?” I called innocently, pressing my palm to my mouth to hide my amused grin. Fenris glanced over at me, a scowl on his face, before he tried to repair the damage to the eggs.  


After a couple more minutes, he had plated the breakfast and brought over two plates of food. He set the plate in front of me, and then he sat down across from me.  


My stomach growled once again as I stared at not the best-looking food in the world. Fenris immediately mistook my hesitation for disgust.  


“You don’t have to eat it, I understand it does not look extremely appetizing now that it is up close,” He said softly.  


I picked up my fork and started eating, ignoring his protests.  


“Just eat your food, Fenris. It tastes great!” I encouraged him, gulping down another bite of bacon.  
He watched me for a few more seconds, before he started eating. We didn’t really speak, as I was hungry that I didn’t think to talk.  


After I had scarfed down that food like it was my last meal, I looked up at Fenris.  


He had already finished and he was silently drinking hot tea and watching me with an entertained expression. I tilted my head, blush rising in my cheeks as I realized he was probably watching me eat like a ravenous animal.  


“D-don’t look at me like that!” I sputtered, looking anywhere but his green eyes that were crinkled up from his smile. Fenris stood up and I thought he was going to leave, but he instead leaned forward over the table. My eyes darted to his face, unsure what his intentions were. His face neared mine and he pressed his lips to mine gently. I felt his tongue lick the corner of my mouth, and then he moved away.  


“What was that?!” I exclaimed, my whole face turning red now.  


“You had some yolk on your face, I thought it would be best if I cleaned it off for you,” He said, picking up his plate to take to the sink.  


“You could’ve- you could've-“ I trip over my words, as I felt something pop in my lower abdomen.  


“Hawke?” Fenris’ worried voice approached me, his hand went to my shoulder, rubbing it.  


For a moment, I thought I peed myself, which I honestly wasn’t embarrassed about anymore since my bladder has been the size of a walnut for the past nine months. But then a constricting pain started in my abdomen, almost like a cramp.  


“I-I think my water just broke,” I said, turning my wide eyes over to Fenris. My husband stared at me in shock, his eyes growing wide as well. He searched my face for any jokiness, but I was dead serious.  


“I should- I should go get Anders!” Fenris said, the words coming out of his mouth in a rush. His lyrium markings began to glow blue, indicating he was extremely worried.  


“If you could hurry, that would be great,” I replied, the uncomfortableness of the contraction making me arch my back momentarily.  


Fenris stood beside me for a moment, and I realized he was contemplating whether he should leave me to go get Anders or not.  


“I will be fine for the five minutes you’re gone, Fenris. This baby won’t be coming out that quick. Just go get fucking Anders, _please_!” I ground out. Fenris nodded and ran out of the kitchen.  


“Oh fuck, fuck fuck fuck,” I gasped out, panic starting to settle in.  


I was having a kid; this baby was coming out of my-  
Oh, Maker.  


Sitting alone in that dining room was the most agonizing three minutes of my life. Soon, I hear Fenris and Anders yelling from a mile away.  


“I leave for maybe half an hour and I come back to her giving birth! Did you do something?!”  


“Yes, because I can control when women have children!”  


“With that face, I wouldn’t expect any less!”  


“Maker’s breath, please come fucking help me,” I begged, irritation clear in my voice.  


I heard the door open and then Anders appeared with Fenris right behind him.  


“Don’t worry, Hawke. It’s early labor. From what I have experienced, you shouldn’t feel too much pain for the next couple of hours,” Anders reassured me, dragging me to my feet.  


“A couple _hours_? For early labor? How long is this going to take?” I looked at him with a gaping mouth.  


“Well, it depends on the person, really. I’ve had labors go for four hours, and then I’ve had some go for a whole day.”  


“There’s a way to speed it up though, right? You can use magic or something, _right_ Anders?” I said, reaching forward to grip his shirt.  


“You better go take a hot shower now, you definitely won’t have time for it later,” Anders said grimly.  


“I’ll help you,” Fenris offered, his voice incredibly soft, especially for him. I looked over at him, before I gladly nodded at his offer for help.  


~!~!!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  


Fenris gave me the gentlest and loving bath, and he rubbed me down with oils afterwards, he even dressed me. It was a nice change, if I am being honest. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Fenris loves in his own way, but it usually wasn’t as…ahem, soft. It was a refreshing change, though I ached for the normal way he treated me.  


“I can’t wait to have sex with you once again,” I told him as he was massaging oil into my stomach. Fenris paused in what he was doing to look up at me. A smirk crossed his face that left my heart racing like it always did.  


“Do not worry, the feelings are mutual, Penelope,” He purred, kissing my swollen stomach.  


“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that!” I heard Anders call from outside the door.  


“Don’t eavesdrop on private conversations,” Fenris snarled at the closed door.  


Finally, after a good three hours, the contractions became closer to one another and more painful than uncomfortable.  


“It’s getting worse, Anders. Sweet Andraste’s titties, it _hurts_ ,” I gasped as I paced in the living room.  


“Maybe you should stop pacing, if you worry your husband anymore, he’s going to bite off one of his fingers,” Anders responded lightly.  


“Now is not the time to joke, mage! Can you not see she is in pain!?” Fenris snapped at Anders, his markings flaring up once again. Once they died down, the apostate rolled his eyes at Fenris’ savage reaction. I, on the other hand, starting fanning my face as if I were hot.  


“Is there anything you could do to wane off the pain?” Fenris asked in a small voice directed at Anders.  


Anders made a surprised noised and turned his amber eyes to the elf, “You want me to use… _magic_? On your _wife_? I’m shocked, Fenris! Are you sure I won’t accidentally murder her with my scary blood magic?” He wiggled his fingers at Fenris’ face.  


I turned to look at them both, pressing my palm to my stomach. Fenris looked at my pained expression and then back to Anders.  


“I know you won’t use blood magic on your best friend, mage. So, do what you must to ease her pain,” He took in a deep breath, before sighing, “Please.”  


“Whoa, he used the ‘p’ word. I can’t resist such an honest plea. I’ll see what I can do,” Anders winked at me, and I rolled my eyes.  


I knew that even if Fenris didn’t ask, the mage wouldn’t let me suffer for much longer. He was one of my best friends, after all. Anders stood up and approached me. He put his hands over my stomach, but he didn’t touch me, his hands just hovered above my clothes. His hands glowed a light blue for a moment, and the pain immediately started weakening.  
I could still feel it, but it was a lot more tolerable than it was a moment ago.  


“Thank you Anders, you’re a godsend.”  


After that, four more hours passed. They were filled with small talk, pain that was quickly sated by Anders, and a couple heated arguments, some which weren’t just between Anders and Fenris. At this point, I had to go upstairs and lay in bed, the pain couldn’t be stopped by Anders’ healing anymore.  


Fenris pulled a chair beside the bed and fussed over me. He would push my hair back from my sweaty face, or he would make sure I was comfortable. Anders, under the scrutiny of Fenris, had to remove my trousers to check how far along I was.  


That was one argument that spawned along the way, and boy was my husband not happy about his ‘arch-enemy’ looking at my lady-bits.  
Even if they were stretched out and had a baby popping out from them.  


“Great, we’re at the fun part. Now you get to push out a child!” Anders said with mock excitedness.  


“Great,” I moaned, letting my head fall back into the fluffy pillows. Fenris took my hand in his as I pushed for a baby. I probably was breaking his hand with my death grip, unfortunately it was the only thing anchoring me to reality. I felt almost delirious, and I just wanted the pain to stop. The only thing I could see was the soft glow of Fenris' markings against his skin.  


Half an hour passes with nothing, until finally, Anders claps.  


“I see the baby’s head, you got this Hawke! Keep pushing, take a break if you need too,” He said, crouching in front of my opened thighs.  


“Maker’s breath!” I screamed out, pressing my knees together, I pushed.  


I opened my eyes to look over at Fenris. He was staring at me with those bright green eyes, and they were full of love and encouragement. Love for me. Even though I was sweating immensely, slightly crying, with my hair sticking up in different directions. He still stared at me with that expression, and it made me melt.  


“You can do this, Penelope. I believe in you,” He murmured in my ear, squeezing my hand back.  


I took in a deep breath, before nodding. I let out a scream in between my teeth, pushing with all my might.  


“You did it Hawke. It’s a boy,” Anders finally said, his voice warm.  


I opened my eyes and peered over my now smaller stomach.  


A bloody squirming baby laid in the sheets, and Anders quickly cut the umbilical cord. I couldn’t help but smile, realizing that it was finally over, and that Fenris and I had a child.  


“I’ll wash him off and then you can see him,” Anders said softly, smiling down at the crying baby as he picked it up with a towel.  


I closed my legs and turned to look at my husband.  


“We have a son, Fenris. Can you believe it?” I whispered, my voice hoarse from screaming.  


He looked down at our intertwined hands, then at my face, his expression softened. He leaned forward and kissed my forehead. He let go of my hand to soothingly stroke my hair.  


“Do you have any names for him?” I asked him.  


Anders came back in, the baby was still wailing, but he was wrapped up in a soft blanket.  


“Here you are, one perfect little bundle of joy. I’ll head downstairs to prepare some things, I’ll be back in a moment.”  


He placed the baby in my arms, and the crying instantly died down. Once Anders was gone, I peeked further into the blanket to get a good look at my child. He had Fenris’ darker olive skin tone, and little pointed elf ears peeked out from the blanket. Wisps of black hair tickled my nose when I gently kissed his forehead. His eyes weren’t open yet, but I secretly hope he had the eyes of his father.  


“He’s so beautiful,” Fenris murmured, awe in his voice.  


“You only think so because he looks like your clone,” I teased.  


“Don’t be absurd. He has your nose and those beautiful high cheek bones,” Fenris reached forward and gently pinched my cheek.  


“What do you want to name him?” I questioned, leaning into him.  


“How about Varric?” Fenris said jokingly.  


“Haha, you’re so funny. I don’t think we need to fan Varric’s ego any higher than it already is,” I replied with a smile.  


I tilted my head for a moment, before a thought hit me, “Malcolm, is Malcolm a good name?”  


“For your father,” Fenris rumbled, a small smile appearing on his lips, “It’s a wonderful name. Malcolm Angel Hawke.”  


“Angel?” I giggled.  


“I thought it was a fitting middle name,” Fenris defended himself, but I could definitely see that name working out.  


Malcolm Angel Hawke.  


“May your life be an easy one,” I whispered to the baby, kissing his nose.


	2. A visit

### Chapter Two:

I was awoken by the sound of wailing across the room. I groaned loudly and turned over, slapping my hand over a bare chest. Fenris jumped and was roused from his sleep.

“Get Malcolm,” I murmured against his cheek, pressing a light kiss to his temple as thanks.

Fenris let out his breath and I felt him shift, his weight leaving the bed. I opened my eyes and sat up, rubbing my cheeks.

It has been a couple weeks with the baby, and let me tell you, it wasn’t all it has cracked up to be so far. Malcolm was a little terror. He had a strong grip, which he liked to pull hair with. And he liked to bite things, even though he had no teeth, it still didn’t feel great when he gnawed on my nipple.

I saw Fenris reached into the wooden crib, his posture as tired as I felt. If Malcolm slept more than four hours, it would be a miracle. I have been running on highly caffeinated tea, while Fenris was just running on fumes.

He careful picked up the crying Malcolm and walked back over to the bed. He plopped down next to me and handed the baby to me.

“What, you can’t rock him to sleep?” I questioned, peering over at my husband.

He scratched his head and yawned, “If I tried, I would probably accidentally throw him. I’m too tired to do anything that cognitive.”

“Well, I’m not exactly the most awake person in the world either,” I mumbled, gently rocking Malcolm.

I looked down at Malcolm once he calmed down a little, and noticed his green eyes were staring up at my face. I couldn’t help but smile at his cute face. He was definitely the spitting image of Fenris, brooding face and all. After a few moments, I felt something fall on my shoulder. Startled, I turned to look. Fenris’ face was against my shoulder, his eyes closed and his mouth open, snoring softly. He had dosed off just sitting there.

I pursed my lips and swallowed the laughter that bubbled up in my chest, a smile gracing my face. Malcolm noticed my look and gave me a gummy grin that melted my heart.

I kept rocking him, hoping that the Maker would help me get him to sleep. After half an hour, Malcolm’s eyes fluttered shut and his body went limp in my arms. I let out a sigh and laid him on the bed so I could move Fenris off me.

I gently grabbed his arms and scooted away, trying to stand up. But, Fenris was not having that. Unconsciously, his arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me to him. I yelped, quickly covering my mouth and glancing at the baby.

He was still asleep, thank the Maker.

“Fenris, let go of me, I need to put Malcolm down,” I whispered, running my fingers through Fenris’ downy white hair.

He either didn’t hear me or ignored me, but I felt his arms wrap tighter around me. I squirmed in his grip for a minute or two, before I finally gave up. I reached for Malcolm, placing him on my stomach, I laid down.

At least I didn’t have to get up to get Malcolm if he started crying. I snuggled into my husband, who rubbed his cheek against my neck, his breath hot against my skin.

I drowsily draped my arm over my child, before I lost the battle with my consciousness.

~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~

Instead of being woken up by the crying of a baby, I woke up rather peacefully. It was different, that was true, but it was nice. And alarming.

Ten different bells went off in my head and I quickly pitched myself into a sitting position. I looked around wildly, thinking maybe Malcolm woke up and crawled off me, falling off the bed and hurting himself.

The bed was empty and cold, so Fenris had been up for a while, and sunlight flittered through the windows, casting light across the end of the bed.

I hurried out of bed, smoothing my crumpled white night-shirt and black pants. I didn’t see Malcolm laying on the floor anywhere bleeding out, and he wasn’t in his crib.

Hopefully Fenris had him.

I took a moment to reassure myself that my husband definitely had the baby, before walking through the hall and down the stairs.

I crept down the stairs and noticed how eerily quiet the house was. It was not reassuring, to say the least. Malcolm was usually giggling or screaming or making some strange noise. I finally made it downstairs and I entered the living room.

And there, sleeping on the couch, were my two men. Fenris was laying on his side, his forehead buried into the crook of his neck, like he was watching Malcolm. The baby, on the other hand, was lying flat on his back. They were both sleeping so peaceful, it made my heart heat up.

I didn’t want to bother them, but Fenris was such a light sleeper, he heard me approach. He snapped his head up instantly and his eyes darted around the room like someone was coming to kill him. His lyrium marking flared light blue. When his green eyes hit me, it took him a moment to register he was safe, and his whole body relaxed.

“I am sorry, I must’ve fallen asleep,” He mumbled, scratching his head.

“No, it’s fine. I didn’t mean to wake you. But why did you bring Malcolm down here?” I questioned, sitting in the old oak chair next to the couch.

“He was starting to cry and you were in such a deep sleep that you didn’t hear. So, I took him downstairs so you could sleep a little longer. And just watching him made me tired, so I fell asleep,” He explained, sitting up careful as to not disturb the baby.

I couldn’t stop the grin that spread over my lips, “You looked so cute with him.”

A blush crept into Fenris’ face and he looked anywhere but my gaze.

“I am not ‘cute’,” He responded hotly, folding his arms over his bare chest.

“Yes you are, you’re adorable,” I teased, standing up.

I approached him and put my hands on his knees, sliding them together, I seated myself in his lap. My legs squeezed his and I wrapped my arms around his neck.

“If Malcolm wakes up, he’s going to be scarred for life,” Fenris jokes softly, clearing his throat as he looks up at my face.

“We’re not doing anything raunchy, maybe just a few heated kisses,” I responded, rubbing my ass against him with a small smirk.

“Right, because what you’re doing right now isn’t considered raunchy,” Fenris said, his voice deep and husky. That was definitely my favorite tone.

I smiled and leaned down, kissing him. His hands went to my hips, his fingers digging into my butt. The kiss became hot and passionate quickly, our tongues meeting. We hadn’t had this much intimacy since we found out I was pregnant. There was the occasional kissing and massages, but now that Malcolm was born, nothing held us back. Well, except for maybe Malcolm himself.

I slid my hands down his torso and felt his scarred but smooth skin. I lightly dragged my nails down his chest, and he shivered under my touch. I smiled against his lips, before I was drawn back into the heated kiss.

Fenris’ hands went under my shirt and snaked up to my breasts. His hands barely touched my cleavage before we heard the front door slam open.

Malcolm wailed at the sudden noise and I froze on top of Fenris, who had removed his hands from under my shirt lightning fast.

“Wo-oah, maybe we should come back later?” A familiar voice called out.

“You gotta be kidding me,” Fenris groaned.

I slunk off my husband and turned to look at everyone who had entered. Varric was up front, and he had a sparkle in his eyes. Aveline, Anders, Isabela, and Merrill were standing behind him.

Mostly everyone was looking away from us, except for Isabela, who just looked interested.

“You caught us! Husband and wife kissing each other? Scandalous,” I joked, my voice slightly cracking.

Varric chuckled and once everyone had regained their posture, Aveline immediately went over to Malcolm, who was crying once again.

“I hope he wasn’t crying the whole time you two were-“

“No Aveline, he was sleeping till someone tried to break down our front door,” I said, turning my gaze to Varric with a scowl.

Varric shrugged, “I just wanted to make our presence known, Chuckles. I am pretty important.”

“I thought you were with the inquisition, what happened?” I questioned him, a smile making its way to my face.

“Small break. They don’t need me all the time. And Anders sent word to all of us you had finally popped out your kid,” Varric said, motioning to Malcolm, who was being cooed at by Aveline.

“Thank you, Anders,” I said to him, sarcasm dripping in my voice.

He sheepishly grinned back at me, “I didn’t think they would all travel down to see you. Especially Isabela.”

“Excuse me? I love children, look at him, he’s so-“ She cleared her throat and shook her head, “I can’t. I absolutely despise children. But it’s Hawke, so I thought I’d at least bring a gift for her little tyke.”

“I thought you were with your clan, Merrill. What happened?” I turned to her.

Merrill twisted her hair, which had grown down to her neck since the last time I saw her. “I wasn’t planning on coming, but Varric showed up at our camp and told me I didn’t have a choice.”

I turned my glare to Varric, who put his hands up in defense.

“It wasn’t that forceful, I assure you, Hawke! I just thought she would want to see the baby at least once.”

“Did you even want to see the baby, Varric?” I asked bluntly.

He laughed, but it was slightly forced, “Of course, I love babies. They are so-so cute and slobbery, and they stink! It’s like a mabari hound pup!” He said, his smile stretching out and making it look painful.

“Don’t forget they shit themselves more than once a day!” Isabela added, her voice disgusted.

“Please don’t compare my son to a mabari puppy,” Fenris snapped.

“Oh right, he’s also Fenris’ child too, isn’t he?” Isabela said with a slightly disappointed voice.

“Well, Hawke can’t really reproduce by herself,” Anders pointed out.

“I’m going to go get dressed. If I leave my child here, is he going to be in danger?” I said finally.

“Danger? Not with Aveline around. She’s such a stick in the mud,” Isabela said with a wink towards me.

“I’ll hold him while you’re gone, Hawke. I won’t let that slut even touch him,” Aveline promised me.

I sighed, rubbing my temples, I motioned for Fenris to follow me. He reluctantly got up and we went upstairs.

“This is going to be a hellish day,” I grumbled as we entered our room.

“You can thank the mage for that,” Fenris growled, searching the closet for a shirt to wear. I followed suit, finding a long sleeved black shirt to go with my black pants. Fenris went with a cotton white short-sleeved shirt and a pair of grey pants.

Once we were dressed and prepared to actually speak with all our friends, we headed downstairs.

It seemed they weren’t prepared for us though, because when we came into the living room, they were all laughing and I could hear Malcolm’s giggles as well.

I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t my child levitating in the middle of the room. Once I stepped foot in the room, everyone went deathly quiet as I stared up at Malcolm, who was still laughing.

I could feel Fenris beside me, his shoulder was stiff against mine. Please don’t say anything.

“Are you using magic on my son?” Fenris asked, his voice deathly low. His tattoos flared up so bright I had to shield my eyes momentarily.

Anders was the only one standing, and I could see a soft green glow coming from his right hand. I made a ‘good luck’ face and kept silent.

“Well, he seemed like he was getting bored, so I just started playing with him. I wasn’t doing anything dangerous, I promise! I would never hurt Malcolm!” Anders quickly explained, lowering the baby enough so I could grab him out of the air.

“He almost set the curtains on fire!” Merrill blurted out, fanning herself like she was extremely hot. Anders whipped around to glare at her, and she pointedly looked at an angry Fenris.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t lie to Fenris when he looks like that!” She exclaimed, fanning herself harder.

“If you could refrain from setting my drapery on fire, that would be nice,” I commented, before going quiet again.

“Do not use your magic on my son, mage. _Ever_. If something happens to him because of fucking magic, I can’t- I won’t-“ His voice cracked and he angrily rubbed his forehead.

I placed my hand on his shoulder and kissed his cheek, murmuring gentle words so he would calm down a little.

“Did you all really get to meet Malcolm? He’s incredibly annoying,” I said after a moment, trying to lighten the mood.

He reached up and grabbed a strand of my hair, yanking on it with his amazingly strong grip.

“Ah, ow!” I yelped, reaching for his tiny hand before he ripped out my hair.

“Looks like he got your grip,” Varric commented with a good-hearted laugh. Anders snorted, clearly getting the innuendo.

“With us both using two-handed weapons, it seems it was inevitable that he would have a good grip,” I said through my clenched teeth, ignoring Varric's sex joke. I finally got him to let go of my hair, and I sighed.

“I brought a present, I want to give it to you so I can leave!” Isabela announced, standing up.

She struts up to me, and she stared down at Malcolm.

“I don’t really like babies, if you couldn’t tell. They are ugly, they stink, they're so tiny, and they cost a lot of sovereigns-“ She paused when I gave her a look, “But, I’ll admit, your ‘baby’ is quite cute. It looks like a little Fenris clone. I hope you enjoy all the years you have to spend looking after the little runt,” She finished. Once her little rant was over, she handed me a scimitar.

Surprised, I looked at the thing in her hands.

“You want to give that to…Malcolm?” I asked uncertainly.

“Yes, of course I do. It’s made of foam, so don’t look at me like a worried hen!” Isabela said with a snicker.

I took it from her and confirmed it was foam when I slashed it easily across Isabela’s abdomen.

“I also am going to give the little tyke a year of training on how to dual wield, free of charge!” She said happily.

I looked at her skeptically, and she laughed me off.

“Don’t worry, I won’t start till he’s old enough. I just thought we need another dual wielder in our little rag-tag group. And he looks like the perfect candidate,” She said.

I wanted to say it was a ridiculous idea, but it seemed like Isabela put a lot of work in her gift, even if it was kind of last minute and stupid. But that was Isabela in a nutshell.

“Thank you, Isabela, I’m glad you are looking out for Malcolm,” I replied, smiling at her.

“Anytime, love. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to find the nearest bar so I can get a drink. All this talk of children has really given me a headache,” She said, scooting past me and leaving.

“Oh, oh! I brought a present from the Dalish as well!” Merrill said, standing up and dusting off her dress.

She approached me, and Fenris took the chance to sit down beside Varric, still rubbing his face.

“You really didn’t have to get him anything, his birthday isn’t till next year!” I joked.

Malcolm looked up at Merrill curiously, blowing spit bubbles.

“I brought him a bracelet, see? It’s magical, so it will grow and shrink with him. It is made of living wood, so rare that this is about all we could find. I hope it will bring him good luck,” Merrill said, producing a small bracelet. It was made of cloth, and it had wooden beads on it.

“That’s a very thoughtful gift, Merrill. I’m sure Malcolm will love it,” I said, gently grabbing Malcolm’s wrist and letting Merrill put it on him.

The bracelet instantly got tiny enough to fit on his wrist without actually being too tight. It was strange but amazing at the same time.

“Now, since you are with child, I brought food for lunch! If you don’t mind, I’m going to prepare it quickly,” Merrill announced, smiling at me.

“You are too kind, thank you again, Merrill,” I said, giving her a half-hug.

Aveline stood up, “I will help her.” She followed Merrill into the kitchen.

Finally, it was Varric, Anders, Fenris, and I. Fenris was tense and sprawled out on the couch next to Varric, who was talking with Anders.

My two best friends and my husband. Malcolm started struggling in my arms as I went to sit down.

“Hey, you’re ok, Malcolm,” I hushed him, rocking him a couple of times.

“He looks angry. Did you do something to him?” Varric asked me, peering over at Malcolm.

“He might be pissed I stopped him from playing with my hair,” I said, looking down at Malcolm, who was looking up at me with a scowl that could compete with Fenris.

“Maker, he looks like a Fenris clone when he broods like that!” Anders commented.

Fenris glanced over in our direction, his eyes flickering to Malcolm, before up at me.

Malcolm started to become fussy, wriggling in my hands and slapping his hands against my body.

“Did you feed him this morning?” I asked Fenris.

He nodded, moving over on the couch so he was closest to me. He put his hand on the baby’s forehead, presumably checking for a fever.

“Change his diaper?” Anders asked, his voice expressing concern for the child.

“I am not an idiot, I know how to take care of my own child, mage,” He snarled.

“Well, we need to rule everything out. He can’t just be so upset over nothing,” Anders retorted.

Anders looked over my shoulder at Malcolm, and his eyes narrowed. “The fade is shifting around him. It’s weird to be seeing signs of magic so early in childhood.” He muttered the last sentence to himself.

Fenris heard him, and he clenched his fists, “This is because you used magic on him, isn’t it? If he is hurt at all, I will rip out your heart.”

“Clearly, that is not at all what I am talking about,” Anders snapped back at my husband.

Fenris’ tattoos started glowing with his anger, and I gently placed my hand over his tense one, hoping it would relax him a little.

“I don’t think this has anything to do with Anders, love. Maybe he’s just tired,” I said, giving my husband a reassuring smile.

“If you don’t mind Hawke,” Anders gestured towards Malcolm, and I silently looked at his hands for a moment, before handing my son over. I felt Fenris tense up next to me, but he didn’t say anything, though I knew he really really wanted to rip Malcolm from Anders’ grip.

I rubbed my thumb on the top of his hand, leaning towards him. He wasn’t paying any attention though, as his gaze was fixated on Anders.

“I’m just going to-“ Anders pressed his hand against Malcolm’s chest, and a harsh red light emitted from his hand.

Malcolm cried out, his wails becoming louder as he struggled against the mage.

I stood up with Fenris and I worriedly stared at my baby. Fenris was clenching his fists, his breath getting heavy and his marking glowing bright enough to wash the whole room in blue.

“What are you doing to the kid?!” Varric asked, standing up to see.

“I’m helping him release some of the magic he is building up. When mages are young, they usually have no way to let out their pent-up energy and they usually let it all go when they get angry. It seems his magic is really bothering him,” Anders explained.

“Are you saying that-“

Before I could finish the sentence, a blast of hot air sent me onto my butt with an 'oomph', Fenris falling on top of me. After a second, he scrambled up and turned around to help me up as well.

“What. Was. That?” Fenris ground out, his hands outstretched to take Malcolm away from Anders.

“That was Malcolm, I told you that all the magic stored up in him was bothering the kid. I just helped him release it so he wouldn’t be so upset,” Anders said, gladly handing Malcolm to Fenris.

The elf quickly checked over his son, making sure he had no visible injuries on his tiny body. Once he was clear, Fenris glared daggers at the apostate.

“But that would mean that he’s a-“

“Yes. Hawke, your son is a mage,” Anders said, looking me in the eyes with a slight hint of sympathy, but he was dead serious.

Silence ensued as my eyes traveled over to my son. Fenris stood frozen, his eyes locked on Malcolm’s chubby face. It didn’t seem possible, to me at least.

I turned back to look at Anders, “But, I am not a mage, Fenris definitely isn’t one. How could he be?”

“Your father was a mage, and so is your sister. Mage blood doesn’t always come from the parents. Sometimes it skips a generation. Hence you not having mage blood, but Malcolm Jr. having it,” Anders said, looking down at Malcolm with a fond expression.

Fenris pulled Malcolm to his body, almost like he would disappeared. I lurched forward, expecting him to be upset, or maybe even _disgusted_.

“He will never be forced to go to a circle. This is my son, I don’t care about the Templars, let them be damned,” He snarled out, cradling the boy in his arms.

Everyone was shocked into silence at that point, even Varric, who usually had a quip for just this moment.

“What a hypocrite,” Anders muttered, moving away from us.

“Lunch is ready, guys! I hope you all are hungry!” I heard Merrill from the kitchen.

“Let’s go, Anders, I’m starving,” Varric complained, and they headed into the kitchen.

I came closer to Fenris and Malcolm, reaching my hand out to run my fingers through my son’s soft downy hair.

“Are you alright, Fenris?” I asked, leaning against his shoulder.

He took a moment to respond, his body moving achingly slow. “I’m not sure what to think. Just this morning, I thought Malcolm was a normal baby with normal problems. But now, when I think of what he will grow up to be, it hurts. I don’t want him to end up like Bethany at the circle, nor like Anders is now,” Fenris murmured, his voice pained.

“He will forge his own path, Fenris. The only thing we can do is raise him and encourage him to do his best. He will figure himself out,” I whispered, placing my chin on the elf’s shoulder and staring down at our child.

“I hope you’re right, amatus. I couldn’t bare the thought of him losing himself to demons,” Fenris whispered, his voice taking on a thick tone.

“He won’t, I know it,” I said, squeezing his arm.

“Earth to lovebirds! Are you coming to eat lunch? Aveline even warmed up Malcolm’s milk too!” Varric called.

“We’re coming!” I called back, turning to smile at Fenris. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Penelope.”


	3. Sort of a prologue?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback to when Fenris first discovered Hawke was pregnant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the one-shot that inspired me to make this little two chapter story about pregnant Hawke. Originally published on Fanfiction.net.

### 

Chapter Three:

“I am already sensing that this is a bad idea,” Fenris said as we walked over to the Hanged Man.

“Don’t be so worried, honestly. It’s not like I walk into danger willingly,” I responded with a hint of humor.

“Don’t joke about something like that, you walk into danger almost every hour of your life,” Fenris stated flatly.

“Hey, when I was younger, it was almost every minute, mind you!”

Fenris heaved a sigh as I chuckled at my own joke.

“You two are late, where have you been?” Varric was standing outside the bar, arms crossed like usual.

“If you would’ve met us, it would have been easier!” I exclaimed.

“I had to get Hawke up,” Fenris interrupted.

“My sympathies,” Varric responded.

“Don’t gang up on me, guys, c’mon,” I complained, turning my face with a pouty look.

“I was only stating why we were late. If you would have gotten up when I said too, we would not be late.”

“If you didn’t keep me up for most of the night, I would’ve gotten up on time,” I retorted.

“Hold on, I gotta write this down. Care to divulge any more details Hawke?” Varric inquired, patting himself down for paper.

I looked over at Fenris and smugly noticed he was blushing fiercely and glaring at me.

“D-do not talk about those kinds of things with Varric present! If I have a story written about me, I will be very unhappy,” Fenris sputtered.

“I’m quaking in my boots,” I said, giving him an innocent smile.

“Here comes Daisy and Blondie!” Varric said as Merrill and Anders approached.

“Good morning everyone,” She said happily, looking over all of us.

When her eyes hit Fenris, she immediately giggled at his flushed cheeks and scowl.

“You look embarrassed, did Varric say something embarrassing already this morning?”

“That seems highly possible knowing that it’s Varric,” Anders said.

“Can we please get going now?” Fenris growled.

“Yeah, we should probably be going,” I said, turning and walking away.

My party followed.

We reached the Wounded Coast, and then found the cave Aslinna had pointed us too. Her brother was murdered by these mad men, and now they were hiding in this cave.

“Did I mention that I hate the underground?” Varric blurted as we entered the cave.

“No, I never heard you once say that, Varric,” I said sarcastically.

That got a snicker from Fenris, and that made me smile. I could remember when he would never laugh at any of my jokes, and he would just stare off somewhere silently with his brooding demeanor. He would rarely speak to any of us, and when he did, it was usually scathing. No one had ever seen him smile, until we became lovers. Varric said when I was walking, Fenris would sometimes just stare at my back and smile. Just a small smile at first, one you would barely notice. Then, he said, the smiles became more loving and gentle. It was hard to believe Varric when he said things like that, but Merrill reported it to me as well. I had to be the luckiest woman alive to have someone like Fenris.

He was so broken at first, and I was just lucky to have him open to me like he did. And now, big news was about to shake up our world.

“Hawke, are you even paying attention?” Varric shook me from my thoughts.

“Oh sorry, what’s up?”

“How are you feeling today?” He questioned me.

I slowed my pace a little, frowning at him.

“Nothing I can’t handle, of course,” I responded.

Varric gave me one worrying look, but he looked back at Fenris, then smoothed out his face.

“Just be careful, for Maker’s sake,” He muttered.

“If I start to pass out, I’ll let you know, trust me,” I teased.

“Please do not do that,” Fenris called from the back of the group.

I looked back at him and stuck out my tongue, before looking back ahead of me. As we trotted through the cave system, fending off spiders, a nauseating feeling curled around my stomach. I thought it was possibly my nerves about this job we took, but I soon realized it was something else as bile rose in my throat.

_Breakfast_ , I thought feebly.

“Hold on, I have to-“ I put my hand up to my mouth and ran over to the nearest rock.

I went behind it, hoping no one followed me, I got sick. As I heaved, I felt a warm hand tenderly touch my back, rubbing it softly.

“It’s ok, you’re ok,” Fenris gentle voice soothed me as tears streaked down my face.

I wanted to push him away, I didn’t want him to see me like this, I wanted to wait! Once I could breathe again, I straightened up and turned to Fenris.

“Are you ok, do we need to go home now?” Fenris asked with his low voice.

“No, I’m fine. It was just something I ate,” I lied, wiping my face off, I stepped away and went back to the group.

Fenris looked at me skeptically, but didn’t push the subject further, following after me. Of course, everyone else was giving me worrisome looks, and I had to glare at each one of them before they stopped.

“I can give you some embrium leaves for the nausea if you wish,” Anders popped up beside me, speaking to me in a hushed tone.

I eyed him for a moment, before I sighed and nodded, “Alright.”

“Though you know I’d love to tell Fenris so I could see his shocked face, but unfortunately this is not my news to tell,” Anders said, placing a leaf and orange leaf in my palm.

“Just put it under your tongue for a couple seconds and then swallow it whole, don’t chew unless you _really_ like spiciness,” He instructed.

I did as I was told, and in a few minutes, my nausea was really gone.

“Thanks Anders,” I said gratefully, bumping shoulders with him.

The man shook his head and smiled at me.

“We’re approaching the clearing,” Varric warned, making Anders slow down so he was in the back with Fenris.

“Don’t stand with me, mage,” Fenris hissed.

“I only came back for a strategic stand point, that you’re back here to annoy is just an added bonus,” Anders retorted, making Fenris scoff.

“Boys, boys, can you save the fighting for when we actually get down to the clearing?” I said with an exasperated tone.

I slid down the gravelly hill that led down into the clearing. A group of ten Templars stood around, talking to each other. When they heard me scraping down the hill, they all turned to me.

“I’m here on behalf of Kirkwall, what exactly is going on here?” I declared.

Apparently, they didn’t find me very funny, because they all glared at me silently.

“Well aren’t you all bristling like a bunch of porcupines. I assume you are all doing something you’re not supposed too,” I said with a tsk.

“If dirty mages think they can use blood magic on us, they are surely mistaken. You would not stop us, Champion of Kirkwall, we have righteous intentions,” The main one insisted.

“’Righteous’? Same story, different face. Aslinna says hello,” I said, pulling out my sword.

The man smiled and I knew something was wrong then. And out of nowhere, archers appeared above them, arrows aimed at me. They weren’t supposed to know we were coming, how were they this prepared. Time slowed as Varric yelled to duck. Everyone scrambled, and I tried to as well. Most of the arrows I dodged easily, but as I jumped for cover behind a rock, an arrow ran right through my shoulder. I clenched my teeth and let out a hissed breath.

“Varric, please handle the archers,” I called out, my voice shaking.

I pressed my hand to my shoulder, the arrow was still lodged in halfway through my shoulder, the pointy end was sticking out of my back. I let out a throaty groan, but I picked up my sword shaft with my good hand.

“Got it Hawke, the rest are yours,” Varric declared after a couple moments.

I came out from behind my cover to see a shocked leader and men. All the archers had bolts through them and some corpses were just smoldering ashes, probably courtesy of Anders and Merrill. I ran forward, aiming straight for the leader with a bellowing war cry. I heard Fenris behind me, yelling out as well.

Bolts and magic shot from behind me hit some of the men, staggering them. Fenris and I finished them off quickly, and after we finished off the last man, my body was drained. I could barely move. I sheathed my sword on my back as everyone approached me.

I let out a weak smile and pressed my hand back to my shoulder. Blood was trickling out of it, but it had soaked through the cloth in between my armor plates. As soon as the arrow was removed, it would be bleeding profusely. I was in extreme pain, and Merrill was the first to notice my wound.

“Oh my, Hawke! You have an arrow through your shoulder!” She gasped out.

“Thanks for noticing, I thought it matched my outfit pretty nicely,” I said, staggering backwards a couple of paces. Feeling lightheaded from the pain, I reached out for something to grab onto too.

“Hawke!” Varric called, but my consciousness was slipping. My hand landed on the familiar gauntlet of Fenris. And I gladly passed out from the pain.

After what seemed like ages, my consciousness started coming back, and I could make out the sounds if someone talking.

“You’re running like a crippled old man! You’re going to cause more damage!” I heard Anders’ yelling.

“It’s either I run fast or I walk, which will help her more?!” Fenris snarled.

“Guys, don’t fight,” I mumbled weakly.

I could feel the cold metal of Fenris’ armor against my hand, and in the back of my mind I realized he was carrying me. I passed out again, and I woke a few minutes later, but I wasn’t being bumped up and down anymore.

“Hawke, if you can hear me, know that this will hurt!” Anders warned.

“Hold on-“ Pain exploded in my shoulder and I let out a cry.

“Stop, stop!” I sobbed, tears streaming down my face, I pushed the wet hand away from my shoulder.

“I need to remove the arrow, Hawke,” Anders said calmly through clenched teeth.

I opened my eyes to look up at a blurry-looking Anders and Fenris.

“Please, I can’t deal with the pain!” I begged, sobs racking my body.

“You can deal with multiple stab wounds in the abdomen from the Arishok, but you can’t withstand me removing a damn arrow from your shoulder?” Anders exclaimed.

I shook my head furiously, pressing my hand to my shoulder.

“Penelope, look at me,” I heard Fenris call me by my first name.

I moved my gaze over to his face, where he was staring at me with his fierce green eyes.

“I’m going to remove this arrow while Anders uses healing magic to relieve the pain, alright?” He said.

He had removed his gauntlets and he pressed his bare hand to my cheek.

I watched him silently for a moment, before I nodded slowly.

“I’m glad she listens to you, I would get nowhere if you weren’t here,” Anders muttered, moving over so Fenris could squat beside him.

“You’re going to be ok, it’s just a shoulder wound,” Fenris said, almost as if he was reassuring himself. I squeezed my eyes shut and clenched my fists.

“I’m going to do it now. One, two, three!”

Pain seared in my shoulder and I let out a scream of agony. Magic coursed into my shoulder, and it relieved some of the pain immediately.

“Please fucking hurry up!” I shrieked at them, digging my fingernails into the grass underneath me.  
I arched my back as the pain returned, even more horrible than before. Another screech ripped from my throat.

“I got it out, it’s alright!” Fenris said, his voice strained and wound-up.

“We need to get her to a safer area, have Varric and Merrill set up that damn camp yet?!” Anders yelled. I heard him get up and stomp away.

“Here is some water, amatus,” Fenris said, using a Tevene pet name.

I lifted my head as a spout was pressed to my lips. I took two sips, before I dropped my head back to the earth.

“It hurts so much, Fenris,” I gasped out, tears still leaking from my eyes.

“I know it does, I am sorry, you will be more comfortable in camp, I promise,” Fenris murmured, pushing my hair away from my sweaty forehead.

“They have camp set up, let’s get her over to a tent so I can see the extent of the damage,” Anders said. I felt warm arms scoot under my neck and knees.

Fenris lifted me up and they ran me around large jutting rocks. On the other side, Varric was preparing a fire, while Merrill put up a tent.

“This one is already set up,” Merrill opened up a tent flap and I was rushed in.

“Please be careful with her!” Merrill said before she left us alone.

Fenris set me down on the lone cot in the tent, and Anders started removing my armor.

“Could we at least have dinner first, Anders?” I joked with a weak voice.

“Even when you’re injured and bleeding out, you still find time to make a stupid joke,” Anders sighed, clearly not impressed with my banter. I felt my gauntlets slip off my hands and my boots come off my feet.

“I’m going to tell you now, Fenris. I’m going to have to take off all the clothing on her upper half. I need to see all the wound,” Anders said in a low voice.

“Well, you don’t need to take my bra off,” I mumbled.

“Even though we all know you want too,” Fenris growled.

Anders let out an exasperated sigh. Fenris reached over me and unclipped the front part of my chest piece, taking it off. Anders gently lifted my upper body up and Fenris removed the back of the chest piece. I was now just in my short sleeved rib knit shirt, which was halfway soaked in blood.

The agonizing pain was now making it hard to stay awake, black dots danced in my vision.

“I’m going to remove your shirt now, this might hurt a little,” Anders said.

Fenris helped me into a sitting position, my shoulder screaming in pain. I let out hissed breath, tears escaping my eyes again.

“I don’t want her to lift her arm, since her collarbone could be broken or worse,” Anders said to Fenris.

Fenris went to my backside and lifted the bunched-up shirt fabric over my head. The rubbing of the fabric against my wound was pure torment. Anders placed a gentle hand on my bad shoulder, sliding the fabric down my arm and off the other as well. Now I was just in my strapless bra, looking weak and tired. My skin was clammy and paler than usual, and I felt like crawling into a warm bed and sleeping for a long time.

“Lay her back down,” Anders ordered.

Fenris lowered me onto my back. I closed my eyes and tried to control my breathing. Cold hands touched my wounded shoulder, and I flinched, squirming a little. He pressed two fingers firmly into one spot, and it left me screaming.

“Don’t do that, you are hurting her!” Fenris snarled at Anders, his voice tense.

“I needed to check and see if her collarbone was broken, and I was right. I have to set it back in place and then use some healing salves and magic,” Anders explained impatiently.

“This is going to hurt like hell, isn’t it?” I gasped out, digging my fingers into the blanket under me.

“It’s the only way your shoulder will heal properly,” Anders replied.

“Just—do it,” I forced out, shaking my head.

Anders didn’t say he was doing it when he did, but I felt swift hands press down into my wound and something popped. The anguish I felt was indescribable, I could remember my screaming and then I passed out from the pain.

I don’t know what time I woke up again, but it was sometime in the evening. I had one blanket draped across my body, and when I tried to move, my body protested. I let out a gasp at the sudden pain from my shoulder.

_Sweet Maker_ , this one was a doozy.

I reached over to touch my shoulder, but it was wrapped tightly in fresh bandages. Warm orange light spilled into the tent as someone opened the flap. Fenris stood just outside, and he was looking at me with relief and a hint of…irritation?

“I am glad you are awake, that means I can talk to you,” He said, his voice flat.

I sat up with great effort, and looked at him as he sat on the floor next to me. We sat in silence for a couple of moments, before he spoke.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He questioned.

_Aw shit._

“T-tell you what?” I said, trying to seem innocent.

They didn’t tell him, did they? I’m going to wring each of their little necks.

“You know exactly what I speak of. Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?” He asked.

I looked away from his piercing green eyes, playing with my fingers.

“I wanted to wait till I was a bit further along,” I mumbled.

“Three months is ‘further along’, Hawke. I can’t believe you are still going out on missions like this and throwing your life around while you’re pregnant!” He hissed.

“This is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you; you get too worried about me! I’ve been doing this for six years, Fenris. I know what I’m doing. I know this baby’s life is precious, but I cannot just stay at home like some housewife while you go out and kill things without me!”

A tense silence ensued, before Fenris let out a long breath.

“Is it my child?” He inquired after a couple moments.

I stared at him incredulously, before I snorted, snickering at his reaction.

“What are you laughing about, it is a sensible question!”

“It’s not, Fenris! You were my first, you’ll be my last. I have not and will not cheat on you. So of course, it’s yours.”

Fenris let out a gentle smile, one that made my heart beat wildly in my chest.

“I will make you a deal. No more going out on missions like this while you are pregnant. I will even stay with you until the child is born. Just, don’t risk your life like this while you carry our child,” He said.

He curled a piece of my hair behind my ear, staring at me with his kind and loving eyes.

“Alright, I think I can deal with it if you’re there,” I said.

Fenris chuckled and kissed my forehead.

“You should get some rest, I shall leave you alone for now,” Fenris stood up.

“Wait, Fenris-“ I grabbed his hand with my good hand, “Stay with me, please?”

He looked down at me for a moment, before he sighed and sat down on the cot with me. I laid down and Fenris put his arm under my head. I reached my arm over me and slid it under his black long sleeved shirt, feeling the smooth skin underneath.

“I love you,” I confided, looking up at his face.

He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine for a few seconds.

“I love you too,” He murmured.


End file.
